Wednesday, October 19, 2011

I have way too much to say today!

And it's not coming out in one post.  Sorry.

I read Karen's After the Before and After blog today (LOVE that blog and Karen is great!) and learned it's Love Your Body Day.

I think I may have written here (at least once or twice) that I don't remember NOT being on a diet and NOT being obsessed with my weight at the same time.  Ever.

I am not on a diet now and I'm really trying hard to ease the obsessing about my weight/body size and what to do about it.  Why? Because I deserve to love my body NOW.  As it is now.

And as it was before the before and after, as it was during, and as it was after.  This is the only body I have and despite what I've done to it, it's served me well:

It got me through 20 years of obesity and depression.
It got me through 6 months of Optifast
It got me through 2 years of brute force weight management
And it's now getting me through the next phase of my journey: moving the line

My legs are not as strong as they were, but they are still strong.  My hands are agile, though they hurt some times.  My back hurts all the time - and it reminds me to be gentle.

And as I type this - I have learned I have some body work to do: I didn't mention my abdomen, my butt, or my breasts.  I can't think of how those parts of my body have served me.  But I can certainly think of all the awful things I've said about them.  How I've tried to pretend they aren't there.  Hide them.

That hurts as type.  Makes me sad.  And it gently and quietly inspires me to stay the course.  To move the line.

So - to my body - my entire body - Thank you.

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