Saturday, December 19, 2009

I am now 25 lbs over weight

Weight: 156.4. 

I am now 25 lbs over weight.  I am 15 lbs heavier than what used to be my ‘happy’ weight and I don’t like it   This week is really and truly the worst week of the year to be worried about weight, but I must stop the gain hemorrhage.

It’s stress.  I’m worried about money.  I’ve been very worried about D. It’s also partly about my job.  There are parts to it that sometimes get to me.  I MUST come up with a non-food reward system for Wednesdays.  Something to look forward to.  Maybe I start going out to lunch on Wednesdays after Judy gets back from lunch.  Maybe that’s what I need to do.  Go for a walk around the mall.  I don’t like sitting on the front desk and I tend to reward myself with food.

And it’s also not wanting to talk to D about it.  He knows.  But still.

I guess that's part of it - I feel embarrassed about the weight gain.

I do crave the simplicity of OPTIFAST.  I did well my first week of soups, but after that it sort of fell apart.   I still think it’s a good plan.

OPTIFAST worked like this:

150 calories @ 8:30 AM
150 calories @ 11:30 AM
150 calories @ 2:30 pm
150 calories @ 5:30 pm
150 calories @ 8:30 pm

As much as I’d like to keep that schedule, I can’t.  So – I go on 1200 calories per day.  How can I split that up and enjoy dinner with Dan?

150 calories @ 9:30 AM – yogurt and sweet potato or nuts
150 calories @  1:30 pm – soup with chicken or shrimp
150 calories @  3:30 pm – protein shake made with Sobe 0-Cal Life water for the vitamins
750 calories @  7:30 pm - whatever D cooks.  I will be asking him to cook lightly most of the time

OK – that’s going to have to be how it works.  And it’s not negotiable, just as OPTIFAST wasn’t negotiable


I know it is not optimal for me to not split my calories more evenly throughout the day, but if I don't do it this way, dinner with D gets ruined.  If this doesn't work, then dinner with D will have to stop, at least how we know it today.  We'll need to eat separate food and he will hate it. 

2 comments:

  1. Can't you just cut out the starch portions of whatever he cooks? I have no idea what (style?) he cooks, but you CAN make this work. Like I said, don't eat the starch portions. I'm a South Beach gal, so I'll focus on what works that way/for me. Are salads part of the meals? Focus more on the salads, meat, vegetables. Have the dressings/sauces on the side, and don't scoop a forkful into it, dip the fork tines in the dressing/sauce, THEN into the food. You'll consume less that way, but still get the flavor. No bread/rolls. No heavy dose of the margerine/butter, even if it's light. A tablespoon goes a long way. Two tablespoons of salad dressing is more than sufficient. No one should eat more than 750 calories in any one meal. He's killing you both if his meals are more than 750 calories worth each evening. You need to have a serious health discussion with him, if that's the case. What's the good of eating those fattening dinners with him, if your life (and ultimately his) is shortened by oh, say, 15 YEARS by eating them? Seriously!

    You lost 70 pounds. You kept them off. YOU CAN DO THIS. YOU HAVE TO.

    :: hugs ::

    ReplyDelete
  2. Maura, really? I have to be honest here (because I care), it seems like you're willing to do anything for D and the dinners and not what's best for yourself. Why is it so important for dinners to stay as you now know them if it doesn't help you get to and stay at goal? I'm sure D loves you and wants what's best, he's going to have to accept changes in your routine. Make a new routine, one you can live with and reach your goals and feel good about yourself. Is it all about the food, or the company? I really do think it's about balance and your new plan doesn't look or feel balanced at all. Don't set yourself up for failure. ((hugs))

    ReplyDelete

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